Index#

• Masculinity
• Hero’s Journey
• Need for Power
• Personal Goals

Masculinity#

I desire hardness — more specifically Roman hardness: a hardness of character.

This hardness is not only of the body, but also of the mind.

Over the years, I have struggled with depression, mental challenges, and extreme loneliness.
Issues of self-esteem and self-worth follow me closely.

I often feel deeply non-conformist. Because I cannot simply adopt a ready-made belief system, I am forced to search for one of my own. Most people, I think, inherit their beliefs; I want to create mine.

“Your belief system shapes who you are.”

Dear reader, because I resist conformity, I have been easy prey to nihilism. This leaves me with a weak sense of identity and a struggle to fit-in with other’s

when you want to be something, acting,faking, trying to fit in, copying and developing helps alot,

I you wish to be “X” you need to act and behave like “X” thing

• example - A ideal programmer, has routine of daily coding daily reading and sitting most of the time on his computer and doing tweaking stuff. has a sophisticated habit related to tech, his speeches are technical and idea’s often revolve around it talks like a tech guy and behaves like knowledgeable professional with a sophisticated yet simple way of talking with other’s etc etc…
  

Body of athlete, mind of a philosopher

masculinity is about strong body and mind that can endure almost anything and collection of affirmative qualities and dominating spirit not evil but noble in nature not greed but growth in nature.

need for power#

in short nature is quite cruel,with power you are allowed to have a small comfort zone without power and strength, you won’t survive if you want to survive and also live with dignity, seek power struggle and endure

my goals#

currently, i am probably studying for MCA, ideally i want to be in veer mata jeejabai university i want strong body, i really love bodybuilding but also i want to be a very good programmer ( i need to work really hard and harder)